Talk about money with your partner and husband is never an easy conversation, especially if you’re not sure what they think, or if you have limited knowledge of how to work with money.
We don’t all share the same philosophy about money, how we earn and spend it, or how we invest it. Unfortunately, the friction surrounding the topic of money and finance can lead to bigger relationship problems, such as so-called financial infidelity, where people hide their purchases from their partners.
Postponing this conversation can often do more harm than good, and research shows that about 64% of couples admit to being “financially incompatible” with their partner according to Bread Financial.
Interestingly enough, the same Bread Financial survey found that 45% of coupled adults admit to some form of financial infidelity in their relationships.
Allowing money problems to interfere with your relationship and your love life can have lasting consequences for both you and your partner. It’s not always possible to immediately understand how everyone you meet works with money, and before you pull the cart before the horse, it’s always best to get some clear judgment before jumping to conclusions.
Still, there are often financial red flags that begin to reveal themselves over time as the relationship progresses. And while you don’t want to feel like you’re telling someone else what they should and shouldn’t do with their money, it’s often better to recognize these issues and have an open dialogue with your partner before it turns into bigger problems.
Financial red flags
Here’s a quick look at some of the financial red flags that could be hurting your relationship without you knowing.
Your partner has persistent financial problems
Let’s face it, we all have financial problems, and often these are carried with us for a long time, only to be resolved when we seek advice or guidance.
While money problems can look different for everyone, from big debts to low credit scores or even overspending, money problems are financial problems that can be solved with the right help or by talking to someone more knowledgeable on the subject.
On average, about two-thirds of all Americans use credit cards, with the average person having at least three credit cards, according to Credit Ninja.
Jumping from one financial pitfall to another, without learning from past mistakes, can no longer be seen as chance, but rather as an active decision to ignore what other people say, or to find ways to deal with the problems. grab.
Unfortunately, having money problems, and not being willing to do anything to address or improve the situation, can be a problem that can harm you and your partner, and possibly others involved.
A lack of financial prosperity
There is no denying that we are not all at the same stage of life in our careers and financial prosperity. Often you will meet someone who has recently started a new career, or who has just re-entered the job market after being laid off. Perhaps your partner decides to go back to school and relies heavily on your income to support the household.
At another time, there will be a point where you or your partner will reach a point where you can create healthy financial habits such as saving for a specific goal, putting some money aside for retirement, or looking to travel or even start a business.
If you notice that your partner is at a point in their life and career where they can save and invest their earnings but don’t have the financial capabilities, consider talking about how they can save some of their money for their pension, or even put it in a piggy bank. account.
Be aware of where they are in their lives and seek guidance on your own so that once you’ve had the conversation, you’ll be aware and can provide actionable practices that you can both use.
They tend to be irresponsible with money
Overspending is not difficult these days, and we often find ourselves spending more money than we budgeted for. There are many instances where we bought something on a whim, without giving it much thought, or used part of our savings to pay for other expenses – this happens to most of us.
However, there comes a time when it is necessary discuss irresponsible spending with your partnerespecially if it starts to have an impact on you or the household.
Ask yourself: Does your partner spend their income on luxuries before paying for more important things like rent, groceries, or utilities? Do they buy items without thinking about the short-term financial impact they could have? Are they prone to running out of money early or during the month? Do they take loans from you and forget to pay you back?
You may find that they hide their purchases from you after you confront them, or are unable to tell you about the purchases they made.
These and other valuable questions will be an important indicator of how your partner handles his money, and whether he or she is simply being irresponsible and ignoring his financial responsibilities for his own good.
Ignoring their financial responsibilities
A lot of us have a financial responsibility whether it be paying off student loans or even paying monthly car installments. Each month, we budget based on our financial needs and make sure our money lasts until we get our next paycheck.
In some cases, people tend to neglect their financial responsibilities and often rely on their spouse or partner to pay for their mistakes, or help them pay for things like rent, utilities, and other important expenses.
Drawing up a budget for your partner or even for your household can help you see where your money is going and what it is being spent on. If your partner deliberately ignores these efforts and prefers to use his money for minor purchases, it shows that he is not willing to commit or improve his actions financially.
Raising irresponsible financial behavior with your partner or spouse is never easy, and it can be an uncomfortable situation at first, but for the long-term good of your relationship, it’s important to voice your concerns and where possible advice.
Your partner is drowning in debt
While we all want to be debt free, many partnered couples, even those who are married, have some form of debt. Research shows that 7 in 10 Americans get married with some debt, whether it’s a credit card or a student loan.
Balancing your debts is not an easy task and it requires you to be careful about your income and spending habits. Making sure you don’t miss payments and that you can pay off your debts is a financial priority for many of us.
Yes, some of us may have more debt than others, and often we see our partners putting debt into a relationship but ignoring the importance of paying it off on time. Being in a relationship or marriage full of debt is more common than we might think, and some people ignore their debt responsibilities, hoping their partners will help them pay them back.
Understanding how your partner has built up his debt over time and what he’s doing to pay it back will give you a clear understanding of his financial responsibilities and money savvy. Unfortunately, this is not always the case, and often many people will hide their debts from their partners, or go into more debt because of irresponsible spending or money habits.
Ignores the importance of talking about money
Another red flag to watch out for is if your partner is deliberately ignoring a conversation about money.
Often they may feel intimidated, even afraid or unwilling to share money matters because they may be afraid of the outcome, but if they are not open to solving their financial problems, you may end up with bigger problems later on. encounter problems.
The “money talk” is never easy and it can be an awkward confrontation with your partner or spouse. If you’re not sure where they stand with money, it’s best to ask or interrogate them when you think the time is right to do so.
If you notice that they have the idea of a budget for your householdor if you are in a marriage where one person is unwilling to make financial compromises, you may want to address these issues as soon as possible.
Maybe not everyone is open to discussing their monetary values or even their income, so be patient with your partner and see how you can make the conversation less awkward or uncomfortable for them.
It’s best to think about how short-term solutions can help your relationship in the long run, but also make sure you’re building a financial future with someone else.
Being with someone who is devoted to someone who is irresponsible with their money, or unwilling to improve their financial situation, can have a detrimental effect on your relationship and well-being.
It’s not easy to handle money matters in a relationship, but the sooner you can get it on the same wavelength about how to make your money work for both of you, the more likely you are to share the same values and philosophy regarding your household finances.
When confronting your partner or spouse about their finances, make sure they are comfortable enough to share their views and ask where you can help them if they need guidance. Instead of ignoring these problems, look at how you can work together to overcome financial difficulties and build a prosperous relationship.
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